Billy and the Goodbye

"Billy and the Goodbye" by Jeremy Frank

She knew that there was no easy way to tell him, but when Billy's mother picked him up from school she had a heavy look in her eyes. "Billy," she said, "it's very difficult for me to say this, but you've known for a while now that your dog, Slippers, has been sick. I'm afraid he passed away while you were at school. I want you to know that he went very quietly and didn't suffer."

Billy was shocked and all the color drained from his face. His eyes welled up with tears, though by sheer force of will he did not cry, and sat silently with his eyes cast downward in the back seat for the rest of the ride. All that night, Billy was quiet and distant. His parents began to worry about him when he refused to come down for dinner. His mother knocked on his door, "Billy? Are you feeling alright."

"No..." Billy said weakly, his voice wavering. "I know you must be sad. Do you want to talk about it?" He repeated himself in that same helpless tone, and
explained that she wouldn't understand how he was feeling. His mother asked if he'd be more comfortable talking to the school counselor.

"Who's that?" Billy asked.

"Well, she's a sort of 'talking doctor' who is very good at listening. A lot of people go to counselors or therapists when they feel sad or angry and want to feel better." Billy didn't know how he felt, but he knew it wasn't good. He was also sure that he didn't want to go crying to his mommy, so he reluctantly agreed to go, and the next morning instead of going to class, he went to the school counselor's office. It was warm and inviting, at least compared to the rest of the school.

"You must be Billy. Do you know why you're here?" asked the counselor.

"Am I in trouble or something?" he asked.

"Not at all" she assured him, "your mother asked me to see you because she said you were feeling sad."

"Yes, my dog Slippers died yesterday" he replied.

"You said his name was 'Slippers'?"

"He had white paws. It looked like he was wearing little slippers."

"Tell me about him" she said calmly.

"Where to begin? It seems like my whole day revolved around Slippers. He would wake me up every morning by licking my face like a big hairy alarm clock with dog breath." Billy actually began to smile, something he no longer thought himself capable of.

"He'd follow me around the house in the mornings, begging for some of my breakfast or trying to steal my toothpaste. I always wondered if he did that because he wanted to clean his teeth or if he thought the taste of mint would go well with scrambled eggs."

"That's adorable. I'd love to hear more about him. How did he make you feel?"

"He always made me feel wanted. He'd whine when I left for school, and when I'd walk home I'd always see him waiting for me in the window, barking and wagging his tail like made when I got close. Even after a hard day, he'd just sort of tilt his head as if to ask 'How was your day?' He seemed more like a friend than a pet. I don't know, I guess you must think I'm crazy."

"Not at all, Billy" she said. "It sounds like he was a great friend to you."

"Well, now I'm not so sure about that. Real friends don't leave you."

"He didn't leave you Billy. He'll always be in your memories and in your heart. Every time you think about him, you'll smile, and that's how he will keep looking after you, like a real friend would. So in that sense, he'll never REALLY be gone."

This made perfect sense to Billy, and was perhaps the wisest thing he had ever heard. Anyone, whether they be people or pets, are only 'gone' when you stop keeping them in your head and your heart. He would always remember the good times he and Slippers had, and Slippers would be with him forever.